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[illegalmarriage]

dumb kids part three

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[aintseennothin]

[Gold, you have found one (1) video tape! It has no marks on it, but it is rewound and ready to be played, if a VCR can be found...

Do you play it, Gold?]

[illegalteendad]

[... yeah he'll play it, why not

it's not like this place has EVER done him wrong or embarrassed him or anything like that

hell it could be a porno for all he knows and wow he has not seen any good pornos in a looong time

(crys makes sure of that and he's got silver for plenty of material anyway so)]

just sit back and enjoy the show

[aintseennothin]

[The tape clicks in, looking over the "beach". It seems serene, several people wandering in and out of frame as they enjoy the luxuries of the beach, ignoring the camera.

Then, who steps into frame but Yellow? She's wearing a swimsuit, but takes no effort to hide her hair, showing her short cut and making it quite clear who it is. She begins speaking, in an almost Bob Ross-like tone and delivery.]

Hello! I'm Yellow. While I am best known for my toxicology, and even my art skills, I'd like to share something with you today. I'd like to invite you to come fishing with me today! And I'd like to personally invite you to grab your line and bait and come along for the ride.

[She pulls a fishing box into frame, setting it down on a stool she prepared. She opens it up. It's full of everything one would need for fishing! Except...]

[aintseennothin]

Oh, darn! I forgot my fishing rod, whatever will I do?

[Yellow puts on a big show of infomercial disappointment, rummaging through the box and hoh-humming. Until finally, she pulls something out - something that's familiar. And she flicks it, straightening out its collapsed form. She taps the end in her palm, like a mugger postures with a bat.]

Perfect. Looks like we're in luck, folks! I can take the time to show you how to make a makeshift fishing rod. Come on with me, we'll see what it takes~

[aintseennothin]

[And in the event you're watching with dread at this point, Gold, it changes scene. Now Yellow is in what looks like a workshop, surrounded by tools and placing the cue stick on the work table. Everything is set up very neatly and purposefully in frame.]

Welcome back! Here, I'll show you what it'll take to convert this beat-up ol' cuestick into something you can use... eh, on the fly. Won't be worth beans but it'll get us out of this pinch, don't you think?

[At which point Yellow begins; the shots are framed lovingly around the torture of the cuestick. Its tip is sawed off, and any solid center hollowed out. Holes are drilled - "oopsie, clumsy me, let's try drilling the other side entirely!" - and drilled, and drilled. It resembles swiss cheese by the time Yellow is done mutilating it, and then she threads the fishing line through the holes and places the reel into the handle, ruining it for good. It's an agonizing set of clips that takes a wonderful ten minutes of footage.]

[aintseennothin]

Now! Let's go fishing!

[Yellow puts the cuestick on her shoulder, and the video cuts back to the beach. Yellow has returned there with the cuestick-turned-shitty-fishingrod and has found a comfortable rocky outcrop.]

Yes, this should be good. There'll be a lot of big, strong fish to try and catch, here!

[And so she casts! As she waits, she idly whittles some of the wood off of the shaft with a knife, whistling pleasantly as curls of wood flutter away in the breeze. She stops when something starts tugging the line, the cuestick letting out a sickly crackling sound as it was strained.]

Oh boy, our first bite!

[aintseennothin]

[Tug! Reel! Pull!!! Surely by now, Gold, you're wishing that she gets tugged into the water and attacked by a Pokémon. But it never happens. Eventually, Yellow pulls in a humongous tentacruel, placing it on the beach.]

Good first catch! Looks like our fake fishingrod held up for a jelly - go on home, big buddy, don't get mad at me.

[Back into the water it goes! And Yellow casts again.

The next fifteen minutes is followed by more sea life pulled from the water. It's quite admirable, how that cuestick is holding up...!]

[aintseennothin]

[Until, of course,]

Ah hah! This oughta do it!

[She starts reeling in something, the cuestick cracking threateningly as it bended in ways it was never meant to bend. Yellow pulls at it for a solid five minutes, the Gyarados at the end of the line leaping out of the water. The cuestick simply shatters, splintering explosively. But Yellow, with the forethought to wear gloves, just brushes the splinters out of her hair and off of her shirt and chucks the broken handle into the rocks.]

[aintseennothin]

[Yellow returns to the camera! It cuts away, back at the earlier spot at the beach. Yellow is all pleasant smiles.]

Why thank you for joining me today on my little fishing adventure! I drew us something nice to commemorate just how interesting our little journey was with that chunk of wood!

[She holds up her sketchbook, where she's lovingly drawn a gyarados at the bottom of the sea chewing on the remains of the cuestick.]

You'll join me next time, won't you?

~fin~

[aintseennothin]

[And then, finally, the scene shifts to Yellow in a small room, sitting comfortably in a posh chair.]

This video wouldn't have been possible without Gold. Truly, a boy so stupid to leave something that valuable behind? Almost left a PokéDex! What an idiot - but that idiocy wouldn't have led to the most wonderful catharsis I've had since I assassinated our last "troubling" character.

Count your blessings, my friend. It's only a matter of time before the promise is broken. Hopefully you aren't too stupid to trust him to fight for you. So my advice to you: take time to really savor the little things. You never know when they'll be gone.

[And then the tape ends.]

slow claps

[illegalteendad]

[that's

he's

ah

ahHHHHHHHH OH MY GOD SHE

THAT'S

HE CAN'T BELIEVE

holy shit where does he begin holy shit fuck that she cannot do that and get away with it

he swore to silver he wouldn't but gold's too angry he wants to go and wreck yellow's shit he's got powerful pokemon he's gotta be able to take her down a notch and maybe even get her back for this bullshit revenge she's getting on him for bringing silver into light

but he's got some hesitance because he did promise silver

he wants to keep his promise very, very badly

... but he kind of wants to go in and hold it over yellow's head that whatever promise she made with silver is so far gone because he's done everything under the sun with his boyfriend except rolling in the hay and see how she likes that poison

but literally everything is going into his anger he's just gonna pace around his pad like the entire day trying to figure out if he wants to go and tell her and risk death or stay and be safe because silver]

1/2

[illegalmarriage]

[Do de do coming on in man he's in a great mood hey Gold guess what-]

[illegalmarriage]

[Wait a minute

wh]

What happened?

[illegalteendad]

[he didn't even notice silver come in so he's a bit startled at his voice



and then he's pushing him to go sit on the couch or something hello sweetheart]

Do me a favor and stay here, alright? I got somethin' to do. [he's trying to sound light hearted but he's obviously on edge]

[illegalmarriage]

[...??] What happened? Lose a bet? [He seems more tense than that but seriously, what's grinding his gears?]

[illegalteendad]

It's nothin', it's nothin'. Somethin' just came up and I gotta go check it out. That's all. [he's casually gonna check and make sure he's got everything mmm yes good

oh

he's gonna kiss silver though because he knows he could die instead of beating yellow

it... doesn't feel like a "see you later" kind of kiss]

[illegalteendad]

[dododo riding on exbro

actually feeling kind of awkward about what happened

it was a seriously dick move to tell yellow right then just like that but it was gonna have to come out sometime and he honestly believes that now's better than later

especially since his plan had been to beat her up and tell her to add salt in the wound

... maybe he was like yellow, just a little, though that's just the quietest little murmur of a doubt and it's gonna be tossed off real fast]

Do you think she'll follow us so soon? I didn't wanna get you or Crys in on this thing, you know, and I'd like to keep it that way. Even if you just walked in no problem.

[illegalmarriage]

...What happened to we've all got each other's backs?

[It's mumbled more than said, but he points towards a room- he doubts that Yellow would follow them, but he doesn't want to head straight back, just in case...]

[illegalteendad]

[yeah he'll go that way]

... S'different. It was personal. [that's his only defense. because he loves and trusts them both, he didn't want them to interfere. because he knew they would]

[illegalmarriage]

Personal. Sure it was.

[If that's his way of saying he wanted to leave to have a pissing contest with Yellow, fine. Whatever.

It's another forested room, but it has a few mountains in the distance. Within a valley in those mountains is a city... Which they're probably going to have to go to now, seeing as the door slams shut behind them.

...There's a small waterfall with a spring of water beneath it nearby. Silver points at it; they can go there.]

[illegalteendad]

It was. She sent me a tape mutilating my cuestick into some damn makeshift rod and she splintered it and used them for toothpick and... Whatever. You'll think whatever I say is stupid.

[he really hates doors that slam shut because they usually can't be reopened and that's total bullshit in his opinion

but this place is really pretty wish they could've gone on a date here any other day--]

1/2

[illegalmarriage]

You almost got yourself killed over a piece of-

[illegalmarriage]

[His complaints are interrupted by the sudden increase in weight in his lap.

Seadra's been replaced by a person.]

[illegalteendad]

[aibro's a kid clinging to your back, too, and they're sitting on a teen like within half a minute

gold is not sure what is going on

but this is weird]

Exbro? Is that you?

[can you please get off he's grumbling and ummmm yeah]

[illegalmarriage]

[...Of course. Of course...

It takes some effort to get off when he's kind of piled himself, but he does his best to roll off of Exbro.]